Saturday, March 28, 2009
Hello POSB,
Where am i to get those crisp notes for your belly o' money glutton. When i push on your button, it disappoints not only me but also my tummy.
There's been a rumour since the day i moved in to my home of 19 years that blackbeard's treasure is buried at the back of my house. How a lie it turned out to be, for the neighbours on the second floor is all that i could see.
3 consecutive digits and a decimal after the first, its impossible to withdraw damned digits into my purse. I'd like to quench my thirst, on diet coke and mentos. Just joking, my stomach will burst! You bloody Santos.
Damn.
Anyways some random quotes just popped out in my head and i figured i would jot them down before i forget. Simple words but gold.
1. "The best spice in the world is hunger" - Wan
2. "Life is all about experience and discovery" - Wise man
3. "Frozen meat is as good as fresh meat" - Butcher
4. "It is safe to do it, but dont get caught" - Civilian
5. "Now then you tell me.. AhhhhhhHHHHHHHHH!" - R.i.p
And currently i am hooked to the game fallout 3. It's actually a ps 3/xbox 360 console game but it has recently been released on PC. This game is very realistic and quite bloody. Not a kiddie game though. However; dangerous as it might lead to undesirable effects and withdrawal symptoms. Eg. Paranoia, epilepsy, asthma attack, hysteria, broken leg etc.
The year 2200.
The fallout after a nuclear explosion.
How badass is that?!
Adios!
Labels: okie dok
Signing off.. 3/28/2009 03:38:00 AM
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Hello Sony Ericsson 910i,
Its been a week since ive been phoneless. & i still have not gotten myself a new no. I dont mind my phone being taken away, however it is the closest non-living thing i have to me which means all my personal data is stored in there. From texts, pictures and even some pond without fishes.
It ticks me off that they rummage through every single thing in there. They think they are doing this for the sake of changing me for the better. Whose sake? Rice wine?
I cannot say that i am truly independent at the age of 19. But at 19, i do have a life. & currently they are confining mine. For how long will this last i wonder? Freedom is all that i ponder.
Anyways i had a nightmare this morning. I saw an eclipse from my kitchen window and heard a loud wind instrument most probably a horn and all of a sudden there was a meteor storm showering across the night sky. As i was watching the strange phenomenon in awe, a blue planet probably Pluto came dropping from the sky.
It barely missed earth and suddenly people came out from nowhere and started cheering. Before we could rejoice, a larger planet maybe Jupiter hit earth and i thought that was the end of us. Then i woke up. Very surreal dream i say.
Weird. I was tripping even in my dreams.
First, the eclipse.
Then came the meteor storm.
Followed by pluto.
And finished off by Jupiter.
Okay, off to Sandtoser!
Anyways,
stop contacting my handphone 9640****. anything reach me through fb/msn/myspace/friendster.
I am being interrogated. Thank you.
Labels: Siloso
Signing off.. 3/21/2009 01:23:00 PM
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Hello readers,
Ok, my grandmothers son is being a pain in the ass crack right now. First, his taken my phone. Now everything which has been purchased using his money, any leisure items which bear his signature, he wants to claim everything back. Too bad i bought my guitar using my OWN money! haha! Oh shit, my underwear is registered under his name. damn.
Which means, this laptop i am using right now. Is going back to papa. So this might be my last post before going on hiatus. I dont feel comfortable typing shizz on a desktop. It is a pity people wont visit my blog anymore T_T but nevermind.
It has been a great 4 months knowing you "http://iareyourfatheryouareigrandfather.blogspot.com/" and you've help me get loads off my chest and also you Acer laptop. Be a man okay. Somehow, Ill find a way out and return. I promise to change your skin. Puffy power!
Any of you lovelies can call me through my home though. Ill be hoping he changes his mind but i doubt he would. Somehow he and his wife despises me being with my friends more than them(?). With parents like them, who wouldnt. Anyhoooooooooooo i'll get a new no. asap. & Ill be taking a break from blogging too.
Some random pics that ill be clearing off for now. Dont angry angry me okay. ^_^
Part time butchers. Not the lesbian butcher okay.
I am not eating surprisingly okay.
But still fat, slim down "lah" boy okay?
Eh this one cannot, too young and skinny. Time machine okay.
Yes, this is me currently. Slim down already okay!
Oi, people praise abit then become balloon issit okay??
Ah-ha. This is okay.
Friendly people i met at the market okay.
Okay thats it,
Take care, dont take drugs! Toodles!
Labels: See you soon
Signing off.. 3/14/2009 09:48:00 PM
Hello God,
i know you're reading this.
Please bless the soul of my friend's brother, Hafiz Bin Hamid who has recently left this world prematurely. I do not know him personally but i have seen him on various occasions and he is a nice person. Yesterday's burial proceeded smoothly, but on our part we are sorry to be late and also if we had caused you more problems Mr Mordant.
Life is so fragile, it takes little effort to squeeze the soul out of a human. Many people believe that before we pass on, we should enjoy ourselves to the fullest extent. Some people choose to party hard or become very important people in life to create memories and leave a good impression or legacy to the ones they left behind.
Ive read about a group of elderly woman who were battling cancer, and whom many can call "Grandma" trying to get into St James and were denied because they were too old. They then fought for their rights to party, but i dont know if they won or not. Maybe that's how they want to cherish their last moments on earth.
As a believer, i believe in the afterworld and a ticket to heaven is obtainable by following a complicated set of rules and practices. I wonder when my time comes, will i be ready to go or not. This is because i think my fate is currently tilting heavier on the scale of hell than heaven. @_@
Right after the burial procession, the car we were in met with a minor accident. My friend who was the driver was slapped with a $5,000 debt. I feel bad because i could have prevented it from happening, but i failed to do so. Hopefully you can have the strength to bear the burden.
And also my phone has been arrested by the Ministry of Home affairs. The bail meted out; getting excellent grades for my exams. But i failed 3 out of 4 of the papers and i haven't told them. So, i guess its time for me to go prepaid. -_- Adding on to that, my intention of getting a job has to be postponed due to the retest nextweek. I plan on locking myself at home during the night to study until its over. i hope to pass the second chance given. Damn me for not passing.. O_O
1 more thing, i apologize bareknuckleman for not attending your gig today due to unforeseen circumstances. T_T
& sorry for the gloomy post,
You sonamajoes.
Labels: death, life
Signing off.. 3/14/2009 05:04:00 PM
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Hello Paris.
Ok, i wont be discreet about this. Ive just reached home. And my heart is still racing. I was trying to sleep for the past few minutes but for the first time in my life i couldnt. The lingering and painful sensation etched on my head reassured me that what had happened a while back was reality. There were two major highlights of 'suey-ness' of the day.
Firstly, i flunked 3/4 of my papers. And now i have to get back to my books to do the supp paper.
However the second event that happened was much more important. To put it into simple terms, i got a 'tycot' roughly half an hour ago, if you know what i mean. Ive heard and read of stories about people, mostly teenagers getting their candy ass whooped in the wee hours of the morning. Not exactly entertaining to hear about, if you get it right in your face.
Ok i'll tell you a little of the story even if you dont want to hear. Haha, you got no choice.
My friends and i were having the daily social gathering which lasted until about 230am. We sat there for 2 hours at this place and later decided to go to a nearby 24 hour store for refreshments when about a few meters from where we had sat, a group of 4-5 people approached us immediately. We had not noticed them earlier on.
My first impression was plain clothes police and thought they were just doing their routine patrol but how wrong was i when a loud thud was produced from my forehead. They had shouted at us a question, "Eh korang mane punye?" before charging. I think they managed to get 3 clean hits on my head before i realized it was a sudden attack, then i glanced behind and saw my mates running off to safety.
You dudettes might say we were sissies for not fighting back but in case you were wondering, they attacked with weapons. Bloody ass weapons which could inflict severe damage. On the other hand, we were armed with a bottle of juice, my oreo wrapper and two loafs of bread. I think that it was a blunt object which hit me, like a wooden pole. However, i am very thankful it was not a sharp weapon.
Seeing that there were many of them and a few others appearing out of nowhere, i made a hasty decision to split from my mates and ran off in a different direction. I barely managed to shake them off even though my head was twirling and took refuge across the street. Thinking back, i could have broken my previous record of shuttle run with that speed.
What a way to get free 'meat' bastards. Some display of cowardice there. And to add on to that, they were most probably people from not around the area of incident as they were advancing from the direction of the carpark. What happened to pride and fair play? I felt that God had helped us by giving a sign to go to the store. It would have been much uglier if we were to be ambushed sitting with our valuables sprawled on the table or if someone were to fell while escaping. This tone of writing might make me sound calm, but..
you're right, i am calm now that ive reached safety . Now for the next step.. .. Leceh ah joy .
Anyways, this is a fictional work. Cool and convincing huh. Lol.
The end.
Labels: Bo pien
Signing off.. 3/12/2009 03:14:00 AM
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Hello motto,
Before going off to neverneverland, i think i am going to give you mottos a few examples of Singlish which can either be expressed verbally or in written form. Some of their origins are obvious while others are debatable. I am doing this just for the fun of it. Do not take it too seriously. An example will be given after every explanation.
Botak = Hairless/Nude head. 'Bo' from the dialect meaning 'don't have' and 'tak' from the Malay word meaning 'dont have'(?). Still wondering where the hair comes from.
"Eh brather, why cut
botak? Going NS issit?"
Tiam = Shut up. Maybe derived from the Malay word 'diam' which has the same meaning.
"
Tiam la. So noisy leh. Later i keel you"
Cop = Steal something/Shoplift. Or maybe a variation of the Malay word 'kaup' meaning take something/everything.
"You stupit ah. Why you
cop only one shoe from the display??"
Buey Tah han = Cannot take it. Or 'Tidak boleh tahan' in Malay.
"
Buey tahan leh. Today so hot even my coolness cannot counter the heat"
*Kana sai = Meaning to get hit by manure/shit. Cross breed word again.
"
Kana sai leh you. You dont know meh can buy infinite burger at Macdonald if you buy ez-link concession"
Lan Cap = To wiggle/shake something. Usually a bottle of sauce.
"Honey, wait for me here. I go there awhile ask that stall chio bu help
lan cap for me"
Lem Bek = Weak. Or 'Lembik' meaning weak in Malay.
"Don't so
lem bek leh. Kunyang or what -_-"
Pu ki ma = Adult flower. No comment.
"
Pu ki ma, so expensive!"
Sheng Siong = A local supermarket. Go here to buy your groceries.
"Eh follow me go
Sheng Siong. My mader ask me to buy 12 eggs"
I think there is a lot more but this is all i could think of for now. Lol.
Wo yao shui jiao.
Labels: Haha liao lor
Signing off.. 3/08/2009 11:56:00 PM
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Hello friends,
Okay heres an amazing story, recently not too long ago about a few days back this week of this month in the year 2009,
there was a student of a local university who was reported to go bonkers after having his scholarship revoked. This student, in the midst of anger and frustration, supposedly bore a grudge against his mentor due to this reason and was alleged to have stabbed the professor on the back and arms and he later died a few moments later. I mean the person who stabbed the professor died after he stabbed someone.
If you want to know the reason why the student died, please hold ctrl + alt and slam the F4 button in fast repetition.
Good luck.
This story is not related to any person living or not. Dont sue me.
Anyways i finally got a job! Wohoo! Finally man! Can have money to partay and sexay!
Works starts tomorrow and my contract ends.. ..
tomorrow . -_-
Labels: e.g. scooters, fall, Vacation
Signing off.. 3/07/2009 02:10:00 AM
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Muhammad Ridhwan
Paris Escargot, Black 357, #01-544
Singapore b013h!
18/03/90
Sambadi Setop Mi (Chairman)
Surefael Company & Co
Singapore 53xYCh1CK5
Dear Mr Sam,
Re: Please employ me, or else..
I am writing this letter to apply for the position of Chairman at your company. Hope you dont mind. I have the qualities and quantities of a professional. I am requesting not much for my salary, not less than 10k a day if possible, however i wont complain if you decide to pay me more.
I dont like to boast about my capabilities here but what i can only say is that you like to watch the teletubbies in your free time dont you? How about those gay costumes under your bed? You sure like to dress up huh even though you are married with 2 lovely kids. Dont even think of risking your lifestyle by not employing me.
Hopefully you review my letter very carefully. I am waiting for your reply patiently. If you dont reply by tomorrow thats it, you wont be able see the sunlight ever again if you know what i mean.
Yours sincerely,
Ridhwan
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Okay, seriously i do need a job. Expenses man. This is one the many times when i wish i was a rich kid. But still i would appreciate it if someone donates a million to me for fun. Ill reward anybody with a light tap on the shoulder for anyone who is willing to do so.
And hopefully i enroll my license soon, its sponsored babe! Vroom vroom!! Too bad i am lazy. =(
Ok i want to sleep. Good night.
Labels: How to write a job application letter
Signing off.. 3/03/2009 12:02:00 AM
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Hello Sandman,
Woah, i did a sleeping marathon today. Felt unwell after returning home from lesters chalet/party. I was quite stoned due to unforeseen circumstances and most of the time i was sitting while others were prancing around.
Then i saw a gangster wannabe provoking everybody who was dancing. I saw that and was provoked too but i was feeling peaceful at that time so nevermind. Lol. At home hibernated from 1pm - 11pm. I caught the fever, flu and cough at the same time. 3 hit combo. Felt like dying. Lol.
Feeling much much better now after taking some medication. However there's still a strained feeling on my chest, prolly due to bronchitis. Whenever i breathe there will be a weezing sound. This sucks.
I am contemplating on quitting smoking as asthma attacks is becoming more frequent. And i do not suffer from asthma in the first place. Going to miss all the lovely times i have had with my cancer stick for the past 6 years we've been together dude =(
Stoned face & sitting at the party.
Labels: bronchitis sucks balls
Signing off.. 3/01/2009 02:49:00 AM
